Sometimes when Mom and Dad are busy I stay on the deck I like it. I can see birds and rabbits and deer one day I saw a turkey it made me crazy I wanted it. There is shade and a water bowl I can hear the other dogs barking so I know where they are. The deck has a gate with a latch I like the deck.
A few days ago Mom and Dad put me on the deck I OPENED THE GATE! I RAN! I am smart I opened the gate I ran! Dad came out the front door to get me I was gone I ran! Dad yelled, “TAKODA COME!” I ran.
I ran next door to see Daisy 2 no name stray dog we ran. I ran to the park I ran to the neighbors they called Mom and Dad my tag says to call for $reward they did. I don’t know $reward but they called they did not keep me, I got away I ran their German Shepherd is old I ran. It was getting dark Mom and Dad walked and drove all over our mountain I ran it was fun. I decided to go home I was hungry Mom said I stunk I had to go to the beauty parlor and get consequences the next day then I smelled good I was shiny. Dad said I am prettier than the lady on the Weather Channel. I am handsome.
There is a lock on my gate now I can’t open it. Mom and Dad have to do it after my leash is on I don’t have thumbs.
I am Mom’s first dog. She says I am a challenge and a pain and a joy. Almost every day, Mom says there is something she did not know about dogs until she got me and I started to grow. She loves me I am a pain I like to run I am a pain. Mom likes to look into my eyes and talk to me and she likes when I cock my head and seem to listen and I am cute. I run. I am a pain in the ass I think that is good because Mom says that then she hugs me and says it again. In the car we look at each other Mom says it is dangerous roads curve she cannot look in my eyes. I put my head on the CD holder armrest thing I sleep, Mom puts her hand on my eyes to stop the sun she loves me.
Mom says she did not know these things because she never had a dog:
- Dogs are a pain, more than Mom imagined, I think I am more than Mom bargained for I am special
- Puppies gain 40 pounds in 3 months they pull on the leash it is dangerous, I am big and strong I run
- I run I need a job I run I am fast I run
- Puppy needle teeth fall out in the house, Dad put them on the table Mom said “disgusting” those teeth are gone they were sharp but now I have big white teeth I get new teeth every week they are different
- Puppies poop like grown men every day sometimes more it stinks it takes time
- Every night some animal takes my poop, Mom and Dad like that they said it sure makes things easy maybe some animal gets nutrition they are not sure I don’t know nutritions yet it sounds good
- I am into decaying animals it it bad I stink It means a bath and consequences, Mom and Dad get mad they say I am inconvenient
- I want to run all the time I run I go see Daisy 2 when I get out Mom and Dad put a double lock on the gate I ate a plant Dracena, Mom thought it froze it looked bad I ate it that is why it looked bad
I got in trouble this week and I started school I went to daycare I will tell you later.
Yesterday the sun was out and it was 80 degrees. Mom and Dad took me to the Bywater Pub in Asheville to celebrate. I met 5 new dog friends and 2 cute little girls. Everyone petted me and fussed over me I am handsome. Everyone said I am SO BIG for 5 months it is true I am big. Yesterday made me 5 months old I am very large for a puppy.
Mom and Dad said I was a good boy and Mom got me a hot dog from Teau Food. It was delicious I want another one. I want to go back there soon. Mom said it is their favorite hangout in the summer we will go back I can’t wait I want to go now. My Mom does not really have a pole sticking out of her head.
I brought a dead raccoon to Mom and Dad today. They were not as pleased as I hoped they would be, it smelled bad it was a furry skeleton with a full tail I was proud. Mom said she will spare you the picture it is very bad.
I had consequences again, vanilla bath consequences. I did not like that I was wet and I smelled like a cookie. Mom and Dad said “TOO BAD, Takoda.” I can’t go out now because it is chilly and I am wet Dad said I might get sick so I shredded my pee pad for fun. They said I am pushing it. I don’t know what it is how can I be pushing it? Mom said I go to daycare tomorrow so she can spring clean I want to play run play bite run.
The other dogs will think I smell funny from consequences I wonder if they get consequences, too?